Letting go is always the hardest part of everything, but it's very likely the most important part of surviving in our world. With all the things we put ourselves through, and all the things that occur to us on a daily basis we really need to learn to find our grace under pressure. So much of the time we spend brooding because we're angry, frustrated, or hurt we could be spending doing things that we love or things that we find fulfilling.
In relationships, if you only consider the awful things that happen you don't learn from them. You brood darkly and it hurts every relationship you have in the future. As each relationship progresses, you begin to focus on the similarities that hurt you before. Pretty soon you only have eyes for what could go wrong, for the bad things. Then it becomes the only thing you notice in your life. Practice leads to permanence, and if you practice bad perception then it becomes all you see. You'll never have a good, lasting, stable relationship if you're too busy looking for ways that it will fail.
Friendships fall under much the same vein as relationships, and this particular point is no exception. It's best to value the good in all your relationships including friendship, even if they don't last. That way you won't be prone to pointing out the annoying little things and have them take over, and instead point out the fabulous things that you enjoy so much about them. Part of being in relationships (platonic and romantic) is maintenance, and any decent self-help book can tell you that if you feel like your relationship is failing you need to make sure that it's not your fault, too.
Value the good in yourself, the good in each other, and the great things that could come from that. I'm not saying ignore any bad things that give you the opportunity for growth, but change the things you can't and let the things you can't be.
Love, Polly.
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